Wisdom

I was looking through some previous posts on our blog today. The best way I can describe my experience was enlightening. As I looked through them I felt a strong desire to get something off my chest.

If you don't care for nonsensical dribble than stop reading now.

As most of you know we have just moved back to Montreal from Australia. What you may not know is that I was not a very happy person in the last few years before moving to Australia. Let's call that my "Montreal Darryl" phase. Looking back on that time now, I'd say it had a lot to do with my job and where I was in relationship to where I figured I should be in my career. The sad thing is that I brought the bulk of my frustrations and anger home and used Stacey as my shrink. I probably sacrificed moments with the kids because I was too preoccupied with work. I was being self centered. Stacey was always supportive but my behavior was selfish and completely unfair to her and the kids.

After leaving Montreal I improved. I think Stacey will agree that I got a piece of my old self back when we lived in Australia. By all accounts my career in Australia was as challenging as previous years but I didn't let it affect my personal life as much. When we decided to move back, I was really worried that I would become "Montreal Darryl" again.

Why am I tell you this? Because I saw "Montreal Darryl" today. The project I am currently on is, for lack of a better term, flawed (do I know how to pick 'em or what?). I talked with Stacey today and unloaded my concerns on her. Once again she was very supportive (Thanks Babe!) but she doesn't need my extra baggage (even though I know she can handle it... she is one tough cookie!).

I'm not writing this post to get sympathy. It's quite the contrary. I am writing this post as a personal reminder (as personal as an open post on a public blog can be) to shut up and stop dwelling on things that matter very little in life. Is my job important to me? Of course? Will I work hard? Absolutely. Does it need to affect my family life the way it has in the past? No.

I also need to remember that I am the only one who can control if "Montreal Darryl" comes back. At the end of the day I still have a fun job. A lot of people can't say that (which is too bad). I have a wonderful and supportive family (even more sad is that there are people who can't say that either).

Stacey once said to me "It must be nice to work at something you love" My reply to that is "Yeah it's the best. Except when things go bad it's hard to let go". The job I do is also a passion of mine so when it goes bad I take it personal. In Australia I worked hard not to let my job get to me. This post also serves as a reminder for me to keep working on that.

That's it. That's my "Jerry Maguire" moment. I hope I didn't bore you too much. That being said maybe the wonderful deep sleep your currently enjoying is a direct result of reading this post. If so... You're very welcome.

Sweet Dreams!

P.S. Thanks Stacey, Shamus and Breagha for giving me perspective.

P.P.S I think I'm reading Cari and Steve's blog too much. That mixed with Oprah has me all emotional.